A Letter to Trillanes: Enjoy the Ice Cream

Dear Senator Trillanes,

I’m not going to comment on the political situation. I’m not going to comment on the clash of ideals or principles or whether your crusade is inspired or misguided, Senator Trillanes. And even if I’m a student of the law I won’t even comment on your blatant disregard for judicial process.

I am, instead, going to suggest certain things on your stay at the Manila Peninsula.

For starters, given your taste for holding five-star hotels hostage, I suggest you try the ice cream at the Peninsula. It’s very good. Then maybe you can try some beverages at the hotel bar, if you haven’t sent the staff home or had them summarily executed. You know, for the sake of the country and the masses and all that jazz.

Then I suggest that, should you survive the siege, you move on down to the Sofitel Philippine Plaza. Having stayed there for my bar exams, I suggest you try the breakfast buffet. Some baguettes, some bacon, and some grapefruit juice may be just the thing to inspire you to lead the Philippine people to sedition, from your lavishly-furnished five-star suite.

Then, at the moment of your triumph, I suggest giving a rousing speech from the balcony at the Manila Hotel, punctuating your nationalism by addressing your new subjects — sorry, your newly liberated citizens — by giving an address from a hotel that the Supreme Court has declared part of the National Patrimony.

Oh wait you think the Supreme Court is corrupt. Point taken. May I suggest the Mandarin instead? The food at Tivoli is very good, and you and your soldier buddies can party all night at the hotel bar.

Unless it’s a gay bar, like someone told me. In which case I didn’t mean to insinuate anything, sir. Don’t ask don’t tell and all that.

Edit: Oh well, I hear prison food is… awful.